Chapter 3- I love you Jennay

Written by Richard Allen

[“Until you make unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.” -Carl Jung]

Jenna noticed the plane engine hanging over the house and attempted to ask Sal to take it down. “Dangerous.” Pointing at it then said. “Down” pointing at the ground then back to the engine, and back at the ground. Sal watched her attentively, patiently waiting for her to finish. Without moving a muscle, he flew into the air smashing into the engine, hugging it and falling to the ground in the side yard, barley missing the house. He sat up smiling as the engine rolled and gently touching the block fence. His face radiated pure innocent joy, it burned her eyes, the sadness morphed into dead unfeeling loneness. It came and went in waves and this day it became overwhelming and she cried again even though it had been months... Dick always stood there and watched her waiting in his own little world making subtle motions with his upper body or a twinge of a smile here or there. She straightened herself up, once he saw she wasn't crying anymore he walked over to the engine and put it on the back of an old rusty car in the front yard as a statue to improve his collection.

She took a liking to Dick very quickly. He was helpful, punctual when he made a promise but he would leave for months at a time and come back as if it had only been moments, picking up on a project right where he left off. Genuinely caring for everyone and everything.

His garden made more than enough food so they never had to scavenge. His strange passion for whatever he did was so attractive. Dick hand crafted matching mother and baby armor to protect them from bites and she had the idea to put it on all the zombies. She did not believe in killing, even if their enemies were already dead, Paul was like minded...

Dick didn't seem to understand what dead was, he was very childlike.

She envied his ability to never change expression yet he expressed himself still... somehow, but most of all he was always happy. Sal slowly wrangled all the zombies roaming around the neighborhood for a few months and armored em up... to keep them from biting and ironically from being bitten too... she mused. That's the best part of armor... "duh" she said to herself. Mr. Johnson was the first neighbor to be fitted with the utility armor because he was the closest zombie being, then Sal focused on the four remaining neighbors, he easily picked them out. Jim the retired cobbler was in good condition besides the golf club embedded in his side. Sal had to do some work removing it but he got it out without breaking anymore bones. Mr. Johnson was plump so it took more time to find or craft all the materials. Mr. Peterson who was a professor of geology. His Tweed jacket was caught between a rock and a massive boulder. Without a single scratch on him. Sal always wanted to ask him what kind of rock he was looking at and what made the other one a boulder and not a rock as well.... so many curiosities in this hard place of a world. finally, Chong Bilushi a 5'8" chubby Japanese man who looked to be in his mid 30's and dressed as a Samurai. His mother who stood 4'3" had long silky black hair filled with spiders and ironically loved to crawl around all creepy even though her legs worked just fine... She would creepily crawl out of an old stone fire pit. Imagining Ms. Himari with armor on flopping on the ground like a fish made Sal laugh but felt bad.

Jenna watched Sal work, days going by in a flash. He's cute in a weird way... those green undead facial features were thin and chiseled. She couldn't fit one hand around his bicep and his forearms were wide and densely muscular, like a gorilla. Her cheeks flushed red and goose bumps tingled from her extremities and reached for her core. Heat flushed outward from deep within.

She spoke out loud. "Do you have a girlfriend?" As she chuckled and stuck out her Toung and winked teasingly. He looked at her eyes for half a second then went back to work cutting leather.

She thought of Paul and put her face in her hands... Loneliness crept over her as it always did when she thought of him, which was all the time.... Especially when being rejected by a zombie...

She trembled and felt so bad for even feeling those ways... About someone else... she prepped herself for that eventuality of dating, if there are any men left on the planet. Her husband was dead. Sal is dead.... Jesus.... help me.

This was so impossible. All of it. She felt so trapped and began breathing shallowly and panicking. She was able to get ahold of herself quickly. She put her hand over her heart and felt it beating fast, as if it would never stop. Focusing on Sal cutting the leather he had cured helped. Her heart began to slow after a few minutes. She tried to clear her mind. Wanting to bear the weight of her reality, to sort herself so it wasn't a distraction in the future. So, she felt it all, all over again and again. The full weight of the emotion. Paul was bitten because she was slow... Tired and without food or water for days.... "Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them." Her father would quote the ancient master Bruce Lee when she would make mistakes as a child. She thought about her urges and controlled them with practiced focuse then chuckled and slapped her face gently, saying "get a hold of yourself Jen..."

then paused to admire her own work on the walls. Beside the door a scrap metal enforced window held a big flower cut from the siding of an old broken washing machine, thin steel and tire scraps were cut to make the center. The tread facing up giving it an interesting texture from a distance. With red and green and brown earthy paint made from ground minerals and clay then mixed with tree sap.

The other three walls held paintings she created. Painstakingly crafting the tools from scratch and re-purposing trashed materials as canvas and building frames and everything. She was obsessed with all old-world art; her favorite artist was a humble man named Ethan Allen who drew for fun. She traded her weeks' worth of salt and some metal scraps for a book on his works. She tried to get Dick into art. He drew surprisingly well for a zombie, painting and elephant with a square body and a normal head. She framed his painting and hung it in the living room.

Jake cooed and she giggled rocking her baby gently. He was getting so heavy and chubby. Thinking deeply, she thought about time. "Six months.... six whole months.... Where does the time go Paul?" She whispered to all of creation, imagining all the answers that were possible. "I'll just wait and see." Smiling at her baby. "Your future will be better." She kissed Jakes forehead and felt so hopeful. Truly hopeful. Sal finished the last armor set so he walked out the door with everything fit it on Ms. Himari. She dropped to the ground and flopped like a fish for a while then gave up and walked normal, occasionally trying to walk with her hands and feet but gave up because she didn't have the range of motion.

Jenna belted out a laugh at the sight and had to stop laughing because she peed a little. These poor people, she fell to the ground holding her stomach because she was laughing so hard. Dick looked directly at her and gave a full-on smile. It was jarring, then she belted out laughing even harder.

Sal left for the trainyard the next day, walking at his unnatural pace... for a zombie. Stopping to observe things that moved to understand them. Watching a bee, butterfly or dragonfly he wanted to talk to them so badly... Unable to figure out how to communicate, so he would try the next one that caught his eye. The patterns on the insects would turn into things from his visions. One was a tree trunk that appeared from between two black dots on the back of an orange butterfly with a fuzzy head that kind of looked like the leaves of a tree. The tiny mane blew in the wind as it flew and Sal wondered if that's where trees come from. "That doesn't make any sense." Sal thought and kept walking. Over time he learned it's faster to carry bigger parts of the train. Starting with pieces of axels, then half the axel, then the full thing. He could nearly carry a full train so he trained with more trains, bench pressing a caboose more times than he could pay attention to count, never tiring. Always maintaining the pace he sets.

His cells regenerating as they're breaking down. Changing at a molecular level without needing to be replenished. Unknown to anyone... at the time. When Sal broke the antidote, his body changed. He was a step above being mostly dead.

His arms got big and bulky but his non- stop working out thinned him down. His forearms and biceps more perfectly proportioned and toned because he lifted such heavy weight for hours, sometimes days at a time. Sal's triceps cut and distinct popped out as he now carried a full train. "This is so much easier!" He thought. "Now the train can come back. This metal snake wasn't what it seemed... how could I have ever thought this was a snake, even if it looked different on its side." He gently set the train on the track. Forgetting the stories he makes up in his head.

The siding was dented and it had a bent axel so he laid it on its side and bent it back, just perfect. Smiling with joy when he sat it on the track and attached it to the other carts. A pile of chopped up carts lay on a plot of empty land near the station. Luckily it was only 10 carts before he stopped chopping them up. Throwing each piece a half mile away from the yard. His legs were powerful now from squatting and walking with all the weight. He could jump even higher now. His ability to focus was improving also. He began to become more aware of time, thinking of Jenna. "She packs so much into her day. The house has furniture exactly like my visions. He saw it more clearly... but still so fuzzy. The sofa was a deep brown color.... now with stitching patchwork. Jenna sewed a cover for it that had the same flowers all over it. The carpet was destroyed so I took it out and Jenna picked tile and I put it in. I loved that rug but Jenna said it was dead and broken. I didn't mind, rash is trash, fix the bad and make the good. His heart smiled.

Sal felt something deep inside his mind move and saw the boy again. He wore a Mighty Mighty Bosstones T-shirt. His face was Hawk like and defined, He almost looked James Dean. The boy had to be 13 years old.

He points at the train cart with the man in a suit underneath. Sal lifted the cart by the roof and ripped a chunk off.

woops. He thought

Walking around to the back of the train and grabing it by the axels, planted his feet to bear the full weight and twisted the train up right.

Keeping the front end in his hands, he pushed it up and up until he was mid-way of the train and let it fall, catching it by a steel reinforced Chassie, he walked it over to the trains and coupling it to the rest.

So many trains they were going for miles now. Another ten miles of carts left to go. Miles of Un-oiled carts screeched then groaned to a halt as he staged the track for another cart. Sal walked back to the boy; he was still pointing at the skeleton in the suit. There was a smaller skeleton he wrapped his arms around, smashed into the chest and fused together almost. Sal noticed a slip of paper in the suit pocket of the small one and took it. The words looked like jibber jabber to him. So, he put it in one of his many pockets and started to leave, looking back at the boy as he disappeared.

As Sal saw the vision disappear, he stopped thinking of him as a vision... but something that was inside his head and connected to his heart. It was like a sad feeling that he felt happy about now...

" that doesn't make sense." he thought as he walked home.

Exiting the trainyards old brick archway he paused. Deep in the distance a thunder rolled. Sal wouldn't have noticed deep down... But the thunder from down over there got louder and louder, his deep down began screaming at him.

The sound amplified tenfold. Sal stopped and imagine a heard of a thousand cattle running for their lives and Sal stood at the center of the way out.

It was as if there weren't buildings in the way... moving right then changing directions and blowing through a neighborhood then mowed through construction equipment. Tactors and Semi’s flew like hot wheels.

Sal stared into the wall of a building across the street from him seeing the monster as if there were nothing in the way.

The wall exploded; the rubble hit him in the cheek.

"That was close" He thought as he bent over to catch the rock that bounced off of his cheek.

Not understanding the danger, he watched his new friend. The gargantuan zombie snarled and gnashed as it crashed, the monsters long hardened nails flailed and swiped, just the tip was in range. Sal moved only as far as he had to. "Be like water" Sal thought.

The monster's claws ripped through the blacktop and curb like butter. Pushing off a sturdy brick house it flew back at Sal through a veil of dust. Catching the monsters by the wrists all of its mass crashed to a halt. Its head smashed into Sal's face; unfazed Sal watched the monster's eyes roll into the back of its head then rattle back to consciousness.

Its claws dangling behind Sal began to mince him to shreds. Sal squeezed and the monsters' hands and they flew off. In tenths of a second Sal's left side was tattered. His left arm dangled at his side and fell off. Half of his guts were missing. What was left of his intestines and organs flopped around. Falling to the ground in front of the screaming monster that showered black and red blood everywhere.

Began wondering what Jenna was up to again, he lifted his head to watch...

The monster's powerful legs launched it towards Sal, inches away, a cone of mist formed and exploded blowing out any remaining glass from windows. Its maw was at Sal's face. Time stopped for Sal. He stared into eternity, blacker than a bottomless pit. Red appeared in the center then exploded into red and black and green. Sal's right punch hit faster than the monster could comprehend its face was gone.

Jenna, he thought as he picked up his left arm and began heading home for a night's rest. His guts leaving a trail of red and green, his vision blurred and his consciousness faded.

Opening his eyes he realized he was in his neighborhood and Jenna was in front of him with her hand over her mouth, looking green. He thought she looked green like his skin. His head bobbed; his body unable to support his head well.

Mr. Jonson snuck up behind Jenna knocking her over.

She screamed and wrestled herself away. Sal tried to help but fell down on top of her. She screamed so fiercely blood flew from her throat....

"Jenna, its ok...." he thought as darkness took him.

### Sal stood and dusted himself off. "Jenna?" he said. "Who's Jenna?" Replied Jimmy. "I don't know I just felt like shouting it out of nowhere." "Sal's gone crazy!" Yelled Lethe and chanted "Crazy crazy crazy." "Shut up!" yelled Sal Gaining his awareness Sal still standing and growling.

"I sound like my friends." He though.

looking down into a corner he saw Jenna crying holding her baby. "Jenna! he thought and walked towards her with his arm out. She cried harder, coughing from her torn throat, she began to whisper a prayer like his other friend from the road who screamed and stopped moving. He listened to her pray for hours, waiting for her to finish whispering.

Falling asleep for half a second then she jerked back awake, jostling jake who began making sad sleepy noises. Sal began growling again.

He thought "Where is that coming from" Stepping backwards, realizing it was him again, he walked out of the house. Unsure if he liked feeling like this... "feeling" he thought.

This was so different than hot or cold. shame or pride... "Hunger." growled out of the deep part of his being. "Yes. That's exactly right.” Answering his deep self.

The rumble feeling came to him Grrrrrrrrreeeeeeeerrr. The sound came to his mind as he slumped into a mini coma.

Unable to live or die. Suspended in limbo, his mind drifted.

He saw tables and chairs and people and feasts of food. Fresh bread and every type of meat and fruit, his hunger pulled him to the table, but when he got there the food turned into his house exactly as it was before.

Broken and failing, he smiled and happily began to rebuild and improve on his technique.

After some time, he realized he was fixing his neighbor's house and his improvements worked amazingly. He was very proud of his work but felt bad for not asking permission so he kept his work to the original look until he got full permission.

###

Jenna's view She looked out the upstairs window and saw her zombie friend, Dick coming home finally after two months. Her baby now eleven months old, squeaked and spoke gibberish sitting in her arms. She smiled and looked at Jakes beautiful green eyes, shook her and said "Who's the cutest baby in the world! You are!" mwah mwah muah kissing his chubby cheeks she walked down stairs to greet her best friend. "It's my only friend." She spoke.

He approached the house, noticing his arm first, she ran to hide her baby in the panic room, then ran back to the door and opened it to see Dick's condition... His arm was missing and there was a hole in him and guts hung there bouncing as he limped. she stared in horror His eyes glowed red and pierced her soul. Seeing the eyes only as he came closer, she screamed. Felling someone behind her kick her foot, realized Mr. Jonson was there, she fell. He straddled her in his armor and pushed, poked and scratched her with bulky suit. She was nearly out when Dick stumbled and fell directly on top of her. Attempting to catch him with the only free hand she had, her grip slipped, leaving her shoulder deep inside Sal’s guts, squirming around trying to get up. Her throat was on fire from screaming. The entire neighborhood came. She nearly escaped and was dogpiled by zombies who just stood back up to trip her over and over again. After hours of struggling, she couldn't move. Fatigue and her will to live faded, then nothing but blackness. She gained consciousness and felt arms under her and a bounce and a dragging sound.

Opening her eyes only slightly she saw his face and couldn't even muster a mental scream anymore. Accepting her fate she gave into her aching muscles and body and lost consciousness. Waking up in her room in her soft bed she tried to turn onto her side and felt her sore body all at once, she cried out and moaned and sat up and turned to put her feet on the floor, groaned and slowly stood.

Panick flashed as she remembered what had happened and scrambled for her baby, falling to the ground immediately. "No!" she exclaimed. Crawling into the hallway on her hands and knees using the door to stand and leaned on for a moment. Her heart raced and she fell into despair and thought of the worst possibilities. She cried and thought about how quickly things went so wrong. Tears stung her eyes as she made her way for the Panick room, heart pounding faster, attempting to compose herself.

"My baby... where is Dick, oh my God. Please no..."  She couldn't see through the tears so she stopped and grounded herself again

. Opening the Panick room, she couldn't breathe. "Jake!" she eked out.

"Jake!!" She screamed, Ignoring every rule in the book.

A loud bang from the second story, she booked it for the stairs. Making it halfway up before seeing Dick walked into the hallway from the baby room. She froze.

Jake started crying and her heart felt relief and a new panic set over her as she stared at Dick watching him stand up after falling through the door shattering it, his deep red eyes bore into her soul again as that night replayed in her head... It felt like an eternity then she heard her baby crying again, she took a step and Sal didn't move so she took another step, then another until she was face to face. An unawareness, was about his face, and he barely noticed her. Still gazing down the stairs in unintelligible way. She grabbed Jake, held him and whimpered. Deciding on a plan of action. Stepping out of the room with jake, strapped to her back. Sliding past Dick and walked down backwards, his guts started to turn black and brown and were drying out and smelled horrid.

She had to force herself not to gag moving past him. Seeing Dick not move an inch, she turned and started walking down the stairs faster, making Jake cry. Dicks head turned and his weight shifted, shaking his head his eyes start glowing bright red again. Letting out a low growl... then a thunderous roar. She attempted to run but made it three steps before Dick was ahead of her. Pulling jake out of his strap to hold him before they die.

"Leave us alone Dick... What happened? Why... why now..." Flashing a smile quickly tears fell down her face, she kissed her baby and tied him into his pack.

Whimpering imagining who he would have been...

Dick stared and stood silently. His eyes dimmed and turned back to their original color. She cried, the suspense was killing her a little at a time.

"Do it!" She yelled.

"Do it!! Get it over with! End it!!" Her gasps turning into whimpers. Exhausted beyond all belief she couldn't take it... She waited for death but it never came.

Falling asleep praying, she jerked awake.

###

Sal knowing he wasn't wanted and extremely confused thought; “Guess I'll go work on something.” Making his way out of the door and down the street to the hardware store. Still limping from his first ever boss fight. His guts broke off and began growing stringy sections, forming in the edges of his missing abdomen.

The first friend encountered on this quest was a beetle crossing the road who disappeared under a car. Lifting a car with the arm that was torn off, the muscle fibers stretched tight under the weight, the three fibers that grew back in the hole held tight, he watched the mandibles and thick black antenna move as it made its way. Escorting his friend through the ruined road until he disappeared in the brush on the otherside.

His thoughts finally back to the quest, heart bursting with hope and happiness.

“So differently than how I was feeling. I don't like having this hole in me... maybe I was scared about almost being halved so it made me angry?... He thought. “That doesn't make any sense...”

Recalling Jenna explaining it to him several times. “You zombies are just sick.” She said with a sad smile. “You are a zombie. That means you died a long time ago and you're still walking around. You don't ever have to be afraid or sad, you just do zombie stuff. I wish I could have that... like you Dick... Just for a moment...” Then her eyes watered while she whispered Paul like she always did.

Sal found the perfect thirty by eighty-inch door to replace the upstairs door that was broken.

The door was installed so he was working on the trim, pushing the finishing nails in with his pointer finger. He had to stop using the hammer because the walls were getting blown away and Jenna threatened to leave if he ever picked up a hammer again.

“Jenna.” He thought about his friend and he smiled for a moment and his face snapped back to the indifference look, after months of training he was able to hold a smile for longer each time but it was so much more difficult right now.

Flashes of visions came to him of that night as he trudged.

Her face, the fear pouring out of her, the smell made him recall throwing up, it felt so wrong but if he gave into it he knew he would like it.

But he would have eaten Jenna. The hunger. The pain. The want... it made him sad the feelings came and went after meditating for a while.

“I don't want to feel those ways ever again.” He thought as he decided who he wanted to be, the burning the highs and icy lows into his memory. He will help this friends that God gave him...

He looked everywhere for her but she was gone for today. It had only been 60 or so suns... She couldn't have gone far.

Sal turned on the radio and put the volume to max and and plopped down accidentally kicking the display that he lovingly built, the briefcase wobbled then fell to the floor with a thud. The case stayed shut but Sal's saw a special glow emanating... from his deep part, it wasn't even the briefcase at all... the edges glowed so shiny, he couldn't hold it in, his body vibrated shaking the entire second story.

He felt the house move and realized it was him. Opening the clasps the lid thudded open, recalling taking medicine when he was a kid, up a single little sphere and help it in front of his eyes that glowed green almost matching his skin. Imagining a little man with a flashlight inside his eyes jumping around for joy.

His right cheek raised in a grin. Laying down he put the clear little sphere into his mouth and swallowed.